Sales Awards: Stroke It

Pop quiz: which recently major, ultra-modern internet company likes/needs to stroke their sales ego by competing for national sales awards typically reserved for old-school air-conditioning, plumbing and roofing supply firms?

Congratulations to Omniture for nominating themselves and winning an award that matters to virtually nobody! You gotta check the show pix too; I haven't seen that many double-breasted suits since Trading Places!

As a huge believer in web analytics and a fan of Omniture's sales & marketing execution, I wonder why they need external validation of their efforts? Perhaps there's truth to the persistent rumor I've heard the last two years that Omniture's sales team is often found, deal after deal, in the web analytics winner's circle...

...with their pants around their ankles.

Having met 10-20 Omniture salespeople over the past 4 years, there's definitely a chip on their soldier (a great thing, BTW), but c'mon guys - with all the cash infusions you had prior to the IPO (and in stark contrast to your less well-funded competitors), you would've had to be comatose to not win the web analytics battle.

I've got OMTR in my kid's education fund, so what I'm trying to say is: show me sumthin'. Show me a blow-out quarter , show me a quarter in which you sign some non-standard, creative megadeals, and show me a kick-ass 2008 here, in Europe *and* in Asia. Actually make money from SearchCenter while you're at it too. Live up to the opportunity that the web's growth and [frankly] your competitors' poor execution has afforded you.

Pull your pants up from around your ankles, look within for your satisfaction, and relax. You're doing just fine *without* the award.

Dad, what's a monopoly?

Whenever I had an academic question as a kid, my dad - who was born in Greece - would always start his answer with something straight out of the film 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding'.

Me: "Dad, what does 'eucalyptus' mean?"
Dad: "Well son, the word 'eucalyptus' comes from the Greek 'eukalyptikos', which means 'well-covered'. It's also the name of the Greek goddess of lamb fertility, whose icon adorns the church at Avrigopoulos near Thermopylae. Interestingly enough......."
Me: "Oh brother, here we go again"

The definition of the term 'monopoly' is much easier. Look at the above graph from Efficient Frontier's blog, which shows share of paid search wallet in the U.S., UK and Europe. Thanks to EF Research for putting this out!

THAT's a monopoly, folks.